How to provide support to children with ADHD as a parent?

A Quick Guide

Children with ADHD regardless of their gender can require support. This support is not only needed in a school setting but also needed in the child’s home. Parents’ support for children with ADHD can go a long way in helping them learn to manage their condition better. Here we will discuss how you can support your child with ADHD as a parent. 

Understanding ADHD

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder ADHD is a neurodevelopmental disorder. It can be either manifest in internalized or externalized symptoms which we will discuss ahead. One thing to keep in mind is that it is a genetic condition. It has nothing to do with parenting or a home environment. Although a home environment can either increase or decrease the severity of the symptoms. 

ADHD is unique to every child who has it. While old research states that it is typically 3-5 times more prevalent in boys, now it is being understood more clearly that girls have it just as much as boys. The way their symptoms manifest themselves is simply different. Let us take a look at the different ways ADHD symptoms present in children.

Inattentive ADHD

The primary indicators of inattention are:

• Being unable to persevere through tiresome or time-consuming chores
• Continually shifting from one task or activity to another
• Having a short attention span and being prone to distraction 
• Having trouble organizing their tasks
• Making casual mistakes, such as in schoolwork
• Showing a lack of ability to understand or follow directions
• Showing signs of forgetfulness or missing items

Hyperactive ADHD 

Typically it is seen that young boys show symptoms of hyperactive ADHD. This can include symptoms such as: 

• Acting without consideration of anything or anyone else
• Disrupting conversations
• Frequent fidgeting
• Having trouble waiting for their turn
• Inability to sit still, particularly in calm or peaceful situations
• Increased physical activity
• Little to no awareness of the risk
• Not being able to focus on tasks
• Talking too much

These symptoms can lead to serious issues in a child’s life, including poor academic performance, poor social connection with other kids and adults, and issues with discipline.

How to help your child with ADHD?

It can be challenging and even exhausting to care for a kid or teen who has Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. However, as a parent, you may support your child with ADHD in overcoming daily obstacles, direct their energy in constructive ways, and calm your family down easier. Additionally, your child has a better chance of succeeding in life if you address their concerns sooner and more frequently.

Executive function deficiencies, or the inability to plan ahead, organize, control urges, and finish tasks, are common in children with ADHD. That calls for you to step in as the executive and give your child further direction as they gradually develop their own executive abilities.

Although the characteristics of ADHD might be nothing short of frustrating, it’s essential to keep in mind that the child who is ignoring, upsetting, or embarrassing you is not acting intentionally. Children with ADHD would like to sit quietly, keep their rooms neat and orderly, and follow every instruction from their parents—but they are unable to do so.

It will be much simpler to react positively and supportively if you keep in mind that your child’s ADHD causes just as much frustration for him or her. You can handle childhood ADHD while having a stable, happy home if you have patience, compassion, and a lot of support.

Learn about the impact of ADHD on the entire family

It’s critical to comprehend how your child’s symptoms affect the entire family before you can properly parent and support a child with ADHD. Numerous behaviors that children with ADHD display can interfere with family life. They frequently fail to “hear” parental commands, which results in their disobedience. They delay other family members because they are unorganized and often distracted. Or they begin tasks but fail to complete them, let alone tidy up afterward. Children that struggle with impulsivity frequently disrupt discussions, demand attention when not needed, and talk without thinking, or saying impolite or uncomfortable things. It can be challenging to put them to bed and get them to sleep. Children with excessive energy may run amok in the house or even endanger themselves.

Read: Understanding The Connection Between ADHD And Anxiety

Effect on other Siblings

Siblings of children with ADHD experience a variety of difficulties as a result of these behaviors. They frequently don’t receive as much attention as a child with ADHD would. When they make mistakes, they might receive harsher punishments, and their achievements might not be as widely acknowledged or recognized. They may be invested as assistant parents—and blamed if the ADHD sibling misbehaves while under their supervision. As a result, siblings may discover that their affection for an ADHD sibling is tainted by jealousy and anger.

Effect on Parents

The challenges of watching over a child with ADHD can be intellectually and physically taxing. The failure of your child to “listen” can cause frustration, which then causes anger—which is then followed by guilt for being upset at your child. You may feel uncomfortable and stressed due to your child’s behavior.

Their behavior can be particularly challenging to accept if there is a fundamental gap between your temperament and that of your child with ADHD.

You need to be able to balance compassion with consistency if you want to successfully raise a child with ADHD. For a child or teen who is learning to control their ADHD, living in a home that offers both love and structure is beneficial.

Getting started on support

Here are a few ideas for getting started.

Avoid wasting your emotional resources on blaming yourself. The majority of the time, ADHD is hereditary and affects specific brain regions. It is not brought on by ineffective parenting or a less-than-ideal home environment.

Do your research on ADHD. Although there is a wealth of information about the diagnosis and management of ADHD, not all of it is reliable or supported by scientific research. It is your responsibility as a consumer to know the difference between correct and incorrect information. How do you distinguish between what will be beneficial and what won’t? Ads that promise to cure ADHD should generally be avoided. Although there is presently no complete cure for ADHD, you can take proactive measures to minimize its effects. Additionally, pay attention to the information’s source. When surfing the Internet, stick to respected websites like those run by the government, nonprofits, or educational institutions.

Ensure that your child receives a thorough evaluation that includes medical, educational, and psychological evaluations (with input from your child’s teacher) to complete the diagnostic process. Additionally, ensure that other disorders that either mimic or frequently occur with ADHD have been considered and ruled out.

Provide Structure

Set expectations, guidelines, and limitations that are clear and consistent. Children with ADHD must understand exactly what is expected of them by others. They struggle to function successfully in uncertain situations where they must “read between the lines” and determine what is expected of them. Working with a specialist can help you focus on a few certain habits, create boundaries, and consistently enforce punishments.

Create a system for discipline that works. A parent should learn proactive, as opposed to reactive, techniques of discipline that teach and reward proper behavior while responding to misbehaving with consequences like time outs or privilege restrictions to support children with ADHD. 

Using Rewards and Consequences

Rewards

• Instead of giving your child food or toys as rewards, give them privileges, praise, or activities.
• Regularly switch up incentives If the incentive is the same every time, children with ADHD become bored.
• Create a chart where positive behavior is noted with points or stars so that your child has a visual reminder of their accomplishments.
• Although immediate rewards outperform the promise of a reward in the future, little incentives that build up to a larger reward can also be effective.
• Rewarding good behavior is a must.

Consequences

• The consequences for your child’s misbehavior should be explained in advance and applied right away.
• Consider using time-outs and losing privileges as punishment for bad behavior.
• Keep your child away from circumstances and surroundings that cause inappropriate behavior.
• When your child misbehaves, inquire as to what he or she might have done instead. Then, have your child repeat it.
• Consequences must always be carried out.

Maintain open lines of communication with the other carers for your child and make an effort to use behavioral approaches consistently across situations and carers.

Encourage your child to learn from mistakes. Sometimes a child’s actions will have unavoidable negative effects. Children with ADHD, however, have trouble understanding the relationship between their actions and these outcomes. Making these connections and learning from mistakes is something that a parent can support their child with ADHD in doing.

Encourage your child to eat healthily

Although food can and does have an impact on your child’s mental health, which in turn appears to have an impact on behavior, diet is not a direct cause of attention deficit disorder. ADHD symptoms can be lessened by keeping an eye on and adjusting your child’s diet, including what, when, and how much.

Fresh foods, regular mealtimes, and avoiding junk food are good for all kids. For kids with ADHD, whose impulsivity and distraction can result in skipped meals, disordered eating, and overeating, these rules are especially important.

Regular eating habits are notoriously absent in children with ADHD. Without parental supervision, these kids might go without food for a long time before bingeing on whatever is available. The physical and emotional well-being of the child may suffer greatly as a result of this practice.

Plan healthy meals or snacks for your child on a regular basis, no more than three hours apart, to prevent poor eating patterns. A child with ADHD needs to eat good food on a regular basis for physical reasons, and mealtimes provide mental breaks and a set rhythm to the day.

• Remove processed foods from your home.
• When dining out, avoid dishes that are high in fat and sugar.
• Turn off any television programs that are full of advertisements for unhealthy foods.
• Give your child a vitamin and mineral supplement every day.

Teach your child social skills

Simple social connections can be challenging for kids with ADHD. They could find it difficult to interpret social cues, talk too much, make too many interruptions, or come off as pushy or “too intense.” Because of their comparatively immature emotional development, they may stand out from peers their own age and become victims of bullying.

But keep in mind that many children with ADHD are incredibly bright and imaginative, and they will eventually learn by themselves how to interact with others and recognize people who aren’t good friends. Additionally, friends may find personality traits amusing and endearing which could irritate parents and teachers.

Steps to develop social skills

Children with ADHD have a difficult time picking up social skills and norms. You may support your child with ADHD in developing better listening skills, learning to understand facial expressions and body language, and improving their group interaction.

• Talk to your child openly about their difficulties and how to fix things while being kind and gentle.
• Play a variety of social role-playing games with your child. Frequently switch roles, and make it enjoyable.
• Make sure to choose playmates for your child who have comparable language and motor skills.
• In the beginning, only one or two friends should be invited.
• Keep a watchful eye on them as they play and enforce a strict no-tolerance policy for pushing, hitting, or screaming.
• Create time and space for your child to play, and frequently praise appropriate play actions.

Avoid problems by keeping children with ADHD occupied

Inactivity in children with ADHD can worsen their symptoms and cause havoc in the home. It’s crucial to keep a child with ADHD occupied without overloading them with activities. Enroll your kid in a music, art, or sports program. Plan quick activities at home to keep your child busy. These can include activities like playing a board game with a sibling, helping you cook, or sketching a picture.

Try not to spend too much time playing video games or watching television to pass the time. Unfortunately, the violence in TV and video games is simply going to worsen your child’s ADHD symptoms.

Boost your child’s self-confidence

Establish a special time each day for you and your child. A child’s self-esteem can be damaged by repeated criticism. A special moment, whether it be an outing, playing games, or just quality time spent with your child, can strengthen them against strikes on their self-worth.

Acknowledge your child’s accomplishments, no matter how minor. Make an effort to recognize when your child is paying attention and acting in accordance with your expectations. Inform your child in detail of their accomplishments. This can boost your child’s self-confidence and encourage him or her to appreciate small victories rather than being overly critical of themselves.

Remind your child of your unwavering love and support for them. There will be times when you may not agree with this. During those times, it will be especially crucial that you recognize and show your child your love despite the ongoing challenges they endure. Assure your child that you will face both good and bad times together.

Help your kid develop social skills. Peers may reject children with ADHD because of their impulsive, hyperactive, or aggressive actions. Parent education may teach you how to encourage and support your kid with ADHD to make friends and teach them how to cooperate with others.

Analyze your child’s capabilities. Many kids with ADHD excel in particular areas, such as art, sports, computers, or technical skills.

Focus on these skills to give your child a feeling of pride and achievement. As he pursues these hobbies, make sure your child has the chance to succeed and that his talents are not compromised by untreated ADHD. Additionally, try your best to avoid using these activities as rewards or as a kind of punishment when your child misbehaves.

ADHD and sleep

Anyone can become less attentive from a lack of sleep, but children with ADHD might suffer greatly. Children with ADHD require at least as much sleep as their non-affected peers, yet they frequently do not get it. Their concentration issues may cause overstimulation and difficulty sleeping. The most effective approach to deal with this issue is a regular, early bedtime, albeit it might not be enough to totally resolve it. Try one or more of the following methods to encourage your child to get more rest:

• Reduce your child’s television time while increasing their daily activity including exercise levels.
• Don’t give your child any caffeine.
• To reduce activity for about an hour before night, set aside a buffer period of time. Find gentler interests like coloring, reading, or silent play.
• Ten minutes should be spent cuddling with your child. This will provide a feeling of love and security and give you some time to unwind.
• Infuse your child’s room with lavender or other scents. The aroma might make your child feel more at ease.
• Use relaxation recordings as your child’s bedtime background music. There are various options, including soothing music and natural sounds. “White noise” is typically found to be relaxing for kids with ADHD. Put a radio on static or turn on an electric fan to produce white noise.

Learn more about How to put the ADHD brain to sleep: 7 easy sleep solutions.

Promoting rest and movement

Children with ADHD frequently have a lot of energy. They can channel their energy in healthy ways and concentrate their attention on particular motions and skills by participating in organized sports and other physical activities. Physical activity has countless advantages, including increased focus, lowered anxiety and depression levels, and accelerated brain development. But what matters most for kids with attention deficit disorders is that exercise promotes improved sleep, which helps lessen ADHD symptoms.

Choose a sport for your child that will appeal to them and plays to their abilities. Sports like softball, which need a lot of “downtime,” are not the greatest for kids with concentration issues. Better possibilities include individual or team sports like basketball and hockey that demand frequent movement. Martial arts training, such as tae kwon do, or yoga, which improves mental control while exercising the body, may also be beneficial for children with ADHD.

Green time’s advantages for children with ADHD

According to research, spending time in outdoors is good for kids with ADHD. When children play in a park with lots of grass and trees rather than on a playground made of concrete, their symptoms of ADHD are significantly reduced. 

Most households have access to parks as well as other natural settings, even in urban areas. Join your kids during this “green time” to enjoy some well-earned fresh air for yourself.

Self-care

It is crucial that you have a healthy life because you are your child’s biggest inspiration and source of strength. You run the risk of losing sight of the structure and support you have painstakingly put in place for your child with ADHD if you are overtired or have just run out of patience.

Seek assistance. You don’t have to raise an ADHD child alone, which is one of the most crucial things to keep in mind. Consult your child’s physicians, therapists, and educators. Join a formal support group as a parent of a child with ADHD. These communities provide a forum for sharing and receiving advice as well as a secure setting for expressing emotions and exchanging experiences.

Take breaks. While it’s great when friends and relatives offer to babysit, you can feel bad about leaving your kid alone or leaving the volunteer with an ADHD child. Next time, take them up on their offer and have an open discussion about how to handle your child.

Ensure your own well-being. Find healthy eating, exercise, and stress-reduction techniques, such as morning meditation or a midnight bath. Recognize when you are sick and get assistance.

Learn how to control behavior effectively. The use of behavioral approaches is widely recognized as an essential part of treating ADHD in kids.

Parent training will educate you on how to modify your behavior, and support and strengthen your bond with your child with ADHD. Through your local parent information and resource center, you may also find out about parent training programs in your neighborhood.

Get to know yourself as well

To determine if you have ADHD. Due to the fact that ADHD is frequently hereditary, many parents of children with ADHD learn that they too have the disorder when their child is diagnosed. In order to support their child at their best, a parent of children with ADHD may require the same kinds of assessments and therapies that they do for their own children. Parental ADHD may increase domestic chaos and impair a parent’s capacity for proactive rather than reactive parenting.

We hope you found this article helpful in learning more about how a parent can support their child with ADHD.